Dealing with Demons

Dealing with Demons

I like to refer to struggles as demons. This way, I envision struggles as little beings / minions that disturb our preferred disposition from time to time.

Everyone has a demon they battle with on and on but some people’s demons are greater than others’.

You think of your demon as the most difficult thing to deal with and then you hear about someone else’s and you’re like, ‘I might just have a bug tbh’.

My thoughts are all over the place – I thought I could come and put some of it down here but it seems stuck.

Let me tell you what I call a demon

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In loving memory

In loving memory

Your memory is eternal

I have said this before

Not a day has gone by in the past 2,920 days that I have not thought about you

Your memory is eternal

How could it not be?

You were excellent

They spoke about love the other day at church

And all that resonated with me and this feeling of love was you

Your memory is eternal

How could it not be?

You were strong

I think about what a man should be and you are the first example that comes to my mind

Your memory is eternal

How could it not be?

You were love at it’s best.

I have never experienced such love on this earth as the one you showed me

Your memory is eternal

How could it not be?

You were smart

Any question I could think of, you had an answer to

Your memory is eternal

I never want to loose my memory of you

I pray to God I never will

I want to think of you everyday for the rest of my life

You are not a memory that should ever be lost

I miss you from the depths of my soul

It feels like a log

But I’m not sad

I can’t explain it

I am grateful

I am more grateful than I am sad

I am grateful to have had a love like yours in this cruel world

I miss you

Oh gosh, I miss you

Your memory is engraved in my heart

I love you

Oh gosh, I love you

Thank you

Thank you for everything

It’s 8 years later and I am honored to be your seed.

You’re the only one you’re sure of

You’re the only one you’re sure of

… and even that isn’t guaranteed

Think about 2 people in a relationship

Any relationship at all

Imagine you are one of those two people

Imagine it’s a friendship

For someone to be your friend, it is assumed that both of you like something about each other.

Now think about this:

You know what you like about the other person

Do you know what they like about you?

You know why you’re friends with that person

Do you know why they are friends with you?

I mean, they may tell you these things.

But do you know for sure ?

Do you know if it’s the truth ?

Now let’s imagine it’s a romantic relationship

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Running, Not Moving.

Running, Not Moving.

old-man-looks-tired-because-with-running-sport-cartoon-character_5541-240

I remember one day a couple of years ago; my friend and I were heading to the cinema to see a movie.

He was a couple of meters ahead of me as I had stopped to send a text.

He looked back and said “Hurry up, we are going to miss the movie”.

I proceeded to run.

After a few seconds running towards him, he burst out laughing saying “how do you do that?”.

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Pick a Date.

Pick a Date.

Image result for pick a date

“Pick a date then work backwards”.

My Boss says this all the time.

I work in a Unit in HR where we plan and deliver trainings. I never thought it would be hard. But as it is with everything involving logistics and many other people besides yourself, planning and delivering trainings is hard and annoying.

I digress.

Do you know why he always said to pick a date? It’s because psychologically if you set a date for something, you sort of do everything within your power to make sure you are ready for that date. Especially when it involves stakeholders other than yourself.

Why am I talking about this?

My Boss’ advice as annoying as it always is, is always super helpful.

It makes things happen.

Personally, I feel that without this advice, I would never have accomplished half the things I have accomplished while working with him.

Anyway this is not a write up about my Boss.

It’s about you and me. It’s about us and why we never get around to doing the things we really want to do.

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This “Love” Thing

This “Love” Thing

I have been having this back and forth argument with my friend about love.

And I thought I’d write about it.

I think Love is a Decision. He doesn’t.

What do you think?

Here’s how I see it:

I believe you decide to give a person your love.

There’s your family who I believe you are “forced” designed to love.

Yes, because I mean, they are family.

But then there’s a special guy or girl.

The one you love in a special kind of way.

The one you have the gooey feelings for.

The one that makes you smile with your heart.

I think you decide to love this person.

The way I see it, we meet several people through the course of lives

We get crushes, we have flings, we think he’s cute, we think she’s cute.

But then there’s the one (or ones) we decide to say the 3 powerful words to – ‘I love you’.

Why do we decide?

My friend says love comes and kicks you in the bottom and you cannot help but love  when that person comes along

I get that.

But I still think love is a decision.

You know how you are asked why you love a person?

Some people have answers.

They say it’s because he’s kind, she’s generous, he makes them feel like a queen, she’s the best friend I never had, bla bla..

See what I think:

I am sure he is not the only kind person you’ve met, and she’s not the only generous person you know.

So why don’t you just love all those other kind and generous people?

Why this one?

That’s where my ‘decision’ argument comes in.

Yup. I think we make that choice. The choice to love them.

Some others don’t have answers.

They are like “You know what? I don’t know why I love them, I just do.”

Some even start to doubt their love when they realize they do not have an answer to this question.

Some think it means the love is deeper, more special when there’s no reason.

I think that’s a bit off point.

But that was relatable so pfff.

My friend says if we choose to love a person then why do we get hurt?

Excuse me, but I think this is even a dumb argument.

  1. Choosing to give your love to someone does not mean that they will choose to give you theirs.
  2. Choosing to give your love to someone does not mean you cannot go back on it.
  3. Choosing to give your love to a person and having them give theirs back to you does not give you immunity against hurt.

We are still human.

We change our minds.

We hurt people without thinking and sometimes with thinking.

We are human.

Things happen.

My closing argument:

There are so many good looking, kind, loving, generous, amazing people we meet through the course of our lives.

But this one comes along and we CHOOSE to love them.

We make that decision.

Write soon xx