Me…

Me…

It’s been a minute.

I have missed this page.

I have missed my keyboard.

I have not been here physically but I have thought about being here fondly everyday.

But I had nothing to give.

But it was not like before.

It was not like the days where there was an emptiness.

There was something, I wanted to write, but the words were not ready.

They were cooking.

Now they’re here.

It is not elaborate or grande

But it is here.

Here it is:

I am this and I am that

A very good this and a very good that

But each day I focus on what I am not

A poor this and a shitty that

and these thoughts cause my heart to bleed

“Why am I not this and why am I not that?”, I ask

But the world responds: “But you are such a good this, can’t you see it?”

I respond: “Oh please, this can be more this and that can be more that, so why isn’t it so?”

I had a thought;

What if I shift my gaze?

What if I focus on the ‘this’ and the ‘that’ that I am?

What if I start to see the good this and the good that?

Today, I searched within

And I saw for myself that indeed, I am this, and indeed, I am that

I am coming to an understanding of the me that I am 

and not who I think I am meant to be.

I hope you find your way here too.

Write soon xx

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