“Ha!! I can never allow that happen to me oh. Never!!” – Typical words you hear from an individual who has just been told of something annoying/disturbing/stupid/’avoidable’ that has happened to someone else.
We think we have the ability to avoid things based on certain steps we take everyday – well I guess to some extent we do. But sometimes we are just saved by grace.
I remember sitting with a group of friends sometime back and someone telling us a story of a girl who was constantly being beaten by her boyfriend. Heyy! see anger! Everyone was angry (bear in mind that none of us knew this girl – we were just hearing ‘gist’).
- “What nonsense?!!! How can a guy beat me?”
- “He’s not even my husband oh, just boyfriend. God forbid!”
- “The girl is a big fool, how can she allow her boyfriend beat her? Why hasn’t she left the relationship?”
- Please spare me that nonsense, if the girl was my sister, I will beat her too.”
Those were some of the numerous negative and slanderous responses that were given that day. Yes, I was part of them.
But when I look back now, I’m thinking, we didn’t have the right to say any of those things. I mean, what if it was us? Did we think that the girl wanted to be beaten?
It’s all so interesting how we humans speak. We have so many opinions about other people’s lives and we fail to consider the big question – ‘What if it was me?’
I know some of you will say you’ve considered it and that you would never allow that to happen to you but still, what if?
When I was younger I would look at people who had lost a parent and say ‘how can this person even smile knowing that a member of their family is gone forever?’ Few years down the line, I lost a parent and oh, trust me there is no template on how to handle such a situation.
Anyway I think I’m rambling because recently I found that I have to deal with some things I thought would never happen to me and all I can think of is, could I have avoided this? Did I bring this upon myself ? And my sincere answer is no. Maybe I could have avoided it but I didn’t know how. The bottom line is Im here now and I just have to deal with it. Now that I know what it feels like to handle such, I realize that I am in no place to judge others.
Before we make that ever so quick and easy decision to judge, let’s think: what if it was me?
It’s a whole lot different when it hits close to home.
Write soon! xx