It’s like taking a pill

It’s like taking a pill

I HATE, absolutely DETEST taking pills.

From the first time I remember popping a pill in my mouth

It has always been a huge problem

It hasn’t changed since

But as with most things around trying to feel better , it’s something you have to do

The other day I likened my job to taking a pill

“Close my eyes pop it in and hope I don’t have to taste it as it goes down my throat”

That’s literally how I carry out every task at work

And as is the case with taking a pill , most times I’m successful .

The drug gets in my belly without a trace in my mouth

Without accidentally hitting the roof of my mouth

Or touching the back of my throat

It just goes down with the liquid as intended

But there are those other times when I pop the pill in and the devil rears it ugly head

Causing the pill to either become too big to flow seamlessly down my throat. Causing the pill to linger on my tongue after the liquid is long gone leaving a repulsive sediment I can almost always never get out of my head

Or causing the pill to stray to the side, fall in between my teeth and in the midst of my confusion, I bite down – ohhh the horror!!!

So yeah

That’s how it is with work

My lucky streak runs out for a bit and I get to experience how incredibly horribly tasting my job can actually be.

The end.

Write soon xx

Advertisements
I need a break…

I need a break…

…sound familiar?

How often do we hear those 4 simple words?

It’s as simple as that “I.Need.A.Break”

Sooo many times right?

I cannot even begin to count how many times I have said it myself.

A break. “Always a good idea”, I say.

But why do we need these breaks?

The way I see it , asking for a break is like asking for an escape from your current life

It could be for whatever reason

To get some air when you’ve been drowning;

To get some love when you’ve been broken;

To get some peace when there’s been chaos;

To take a breather when you’ve been panting;

To get some warmth when you’ve been freezing

To get some healing when you’ve been hurting;

To get some cold air when you’ve been burning; or

To get a life when you’ve lost yours.

So the way I see it , you never need a break from something that’s good.

LoL. That sentence maybe completely wrong you know 

I just remembered an episode of Sex and the City where Carrie was in a seemingly perfect relationship with Aiden and was having palpitations because she couldn’t fathom how good things were. She actually asked for a break from their perfect relationship.

I guess I could argue here that the “perfect” relationship was causing her distress that she needed a break from.

But then again Carrie was sort of dysfunctional.

Cont’d:

Or have you ever needed a break from the good life to get some much needed pain and suffering?

I haven’t.

But I won’t judge you if you have *wink*

Back to my point:

A break suggests you’re trying to escape something

Trying to get away from something that brings you less joy than you bargained for

A break suggests there’s something better…

Crap! I can feel the bias in this write up 

I’m doubting my own write up *palm face*

But I’m still gonna go on, see if I can convince you. 

This write up was inspired by a conversation with a dear friend btw.

Anyway let me go on with my argument

*clears throat*

Cont’d:

I’m not saying that a perfect life exists where you never want to leave even for a holiday

My doubts about this write up resumed right after that one sentence.

Oh gosh! The devil is a liar 

I just went to type the end of this post before I continue let me see if I can work my way to that end 

Having the end makes me convince myself that it’s a good and unbiased post 🙂 

Okay, here we go again

Cont’d:

What I am saying is

It is important that we pay attention to the yearnings for these said ‘breaks’ and try to articulate a few things:

How often do I need these breaks?

What are my major reasons for needing this breaks?

Do I see an opportunity to escape and jump at it like my life depended on it?

How do I feel when I take these breaks?

How quickly after a break do I feel I need to go on another one?

Are there consistent triggers for requiring these breaks?

Or are they borne out of a bunch of different reasons?

Let me just say what I want to say…

If you are constantly needing to run away from your life, then that may not be the life you ought to be living

How about you seek some change so that your life is a place you want to stay in not somewhere you feel the need to run away from

Sometimes it is difficult to attain this change

So do this:

Fill your life up with lots of of other interesting factors that cancel out or drown the part of your life that makes you want to run

Find what makes you happy

Find a life that makes you want to stay

Try to make sure the life you choose isn’t one you want to run away from every now and then.

Oh gosh… I hope I convinced you with this post.

Even a little bit *sigh*

Even if I failed, I hope you enjoyed reading it at least 🙂

Write soon xx

Psst! Wanna Know a Secret?

Psst! Wanna Know a Secret?

“We all have secrets”. We’ve heard this a million and one times!

I’ve always felt like I wanted to know things…

You know those “What if” questions that come up every now and then and end with “Would you want to know?” or “would you want to be told?”

I guess I had a few “No’s” to these sort of questions but deep down I always wanted to know things.

I felt like it was better if things were just out in the open rather than having to wonder; Is this happening or is this not happening.

“It’s better to just know” I always said.

I’m getting to my point 🙂

Anyway, we would agree that 9 out of 10 times if someone whispered in our ears; “Wanna know a secret?” our answer would be “Yes!”

That 1 time we say no is usually when we have an idea of what the secret might be and are scared to know the truth.

The question that leads to the 1 time we say no is hardly ever phrased as “Wanna know a secret?”

It’s usually more like “I have something to tell you.” DA DA DA DOOM *Insert other tense music here*

I’m still getting to my point, be patient.

There are these other times when we’re not even searching for anything and a secret falls right on your laps.

You either respond as the person who wants to know things or you walk away.

“Walk away????” Who are we kidding? We would dig right in.

Oh? We don’t? Alright then? Lets stick to that story.

But when we do dig, for those of us who will, what do we do when we find what we find?

What do we do with the realization of this secret?

What do you do when a realization shatters the essence someone has built with you?

What do we do then?

Secrets.. better left unsaid or not?

Do secrets do more harm when they are out in the open or when they are kept hidden?

How was the term secret even coined?

Who said things had to be hidden?

Write soon xx

Pain

Pain

“That’s the thing about pain, it demands to be felt” – stolen from The Fault in our Stars.

I wasn’t even thinking about the movie when this phrase popped in my mind a few hours ago.
But what is realer than this phrase?
We can hide our pain from others, pretend it’s not there just so people leave us alone
But we feel it.
It’s there.
We know it is.
Pain is real and it’s not just the kind gotten from a bite , or a bruise , or a beating , or an accident.
Pain comes in all sorts of forms.
I think the worst kind is the emotional pain.
The pain that cannot be described
The pain you cannot rate on a scale
The pain you cannot describe to your physician
The pain that cannot be analyzed
The pain that others think is false
The pain that others can never comprehend
The pain that only you can understand
Yes, I think that’s the worst kind.
These pains exist
They may not be happening to us
But it is being felt by so many around us:
That person that can never seem to get his act together
That other person that is “always forming depressed”
That other person that has gone mute because they’d rather be silent than have to ever speak about the pains they experience
That other person who you “never know what’s going on with”
And that ‘other other’ person too.
 It’s out there
This pain is immense
I myself do not completely understand it
 But I have been “privileged” (I used that word very lightly as I am unsure as to whether or not it is in fact a privilege) to imagine, simply imagine the pain of another
 Show love.
There’s already too much pain in the world
Please show love; that person needs it
They need it like they need their very lives
Please show love.
You already do?
Show some more.
You think they’re taking the piss?
Let them.
Show some more love .
They don’t seem to want it?
Show some more love
Please show love. There’s already too much pain in the world.
Write soon xx
I’m thinking…

I’m thinking…

I’m thinking I should know by now

I’m thinking this shouldn’t be by now

I’m wondering why

I’m wondering when

I’m wondering how

I’m wondering who

I’m wondering what

I’m wondering

My mind is on a constant roller coaster

I’m in a constant state of confusion

I’m overwhelmed

I’m underwhelmed

I’m tired – I shouldn’t be

I’m energetic – I don’t know what to do with it

I’m stressed – I haven’t been doing anything

I’m scared – not sure why

I’m angry – mostly at myself

I’m cranky – probably be

I’m hungry – I just ate

I’m drowning – I can swim

I’m cold – I have a jacket on

I’m hot – Its freezing here

I’m tired – I don’t want to be

I’m tired – It’s hard not to be.

Write soon xx

 

Brilliant Poem by a 14 Year Old – On Contentment

Brilliant Poem by a 14 Year Old – On Contentment

I was reading about contentment on bible.org – a website I absolutely love by the way. A website I would recommend to anyone looking to really study the word of God and find out different interpretations of bible passages.

It’s an absolutely brilliant site.

Anyway I was reading about contentment – a topic I am deeply fascinated about and always interested in discussing.

How nothing is ever enough…

How the search for more begs the question about whether we’re greedy, selfish, ungrateful or just “go getters”.

Here’s the beautiful poem a wise 14 year old wrote:

Title: Present Tense

It was spring, but it was summer I wanted—

The warm days and the great outdoors.

It was summer, but it was fall I wanted—

The colorful leaves and the cool, dry air.

It was fall, but it was winter I wanted—

The beautiful snow and the joy of the holiday season.

It was winter, but it was spring I wanted—

The warmth and the blossoming of nature.

I was a child, but it was adulthood I wanted—

The freedom and the respect.

I was twenty, but it was thirty I wanted—

To be mature and sophisticated.

I was middle-aged, but it was twenty I wanted—

The youth and the free spirit.

I was retired, but it was middle-age I wanted—

The presence of mind without limitations.

My life was over—but I never got what I wanted!

Apt! Isn’t  it?

Write soon! xx